After Adoption

Defining and Maintaining Your Relationship After Adoption

One of the strengths of the open adoption process  is the ability it provides the birth mother (and, if appropriate, the birthfather) to maintain contact with their child after birth and placement. Whether you're a pregnant teen or a woman whose pregnancy has just come along at the wrong time for everyone concerned, the possibility of maintaining a relationship with your child after placement with the adopting parents you have selected can save you from uncertainty, regret, and continued second-guessing of your parenting decision to place your child for adoption.

Unlike a generation ago when adoptions were “closed” and adoptive parents were selected by the adoption agency with no knowledge or involvement by the placing birthmother, in “open” adoption you, as the birthmother, personally establish your “wish list”, or criteria, for an adoptive family and then choose the adoptive family of your choice, who meets your criteria. As soon as you find the right family for your baby, you can begin to get to know the adoptive parents who will raise your child, and work toward defining the level of contact you want to maintain with the adopting family following birth and placement. The ongoing contacts may be limited (such as periodic letters and pictures) or may be more involved (such as phone calls, emails, videos and/or pre-arranged visits). You may also document in writing your agreed upon ongoing post-placement contacts by means of a Post Adoption Contact Agreement.

We encourage birthmothers and adoptive families to enter into a Post-Adoption Contact Agreement, so that everyone's understandings and preferences are fully documented and clearly defined.

For more information about the open adoption process and what it can mean for you in the long run, contact adoption services attorney Tim Blied by calling toll-free at (800) 678-6811, or by e-mailing us.